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I can see it now: Our president wakes up today and gazes into the mirror. Today is his 60th bday. No matter what his statistics may be, he’ll reach down inside and bleat out a Christina Aquilera ditty:

You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can’t bring you down
You are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can’t bring you down
Don’t you bring me down today…


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